Lately, our days have been going something like this:
Me: LM I'm going downstairs to grab something, whatever you do don't (insert one of 100 things here) ________.
2 minutes later.
LM: Momma, I did ________.
Me: Didn't I tell you not to do that.
LM: Yeah. I need time out.
LM: I just pushed that boy.
Me: Why did you do that. We need to go say you are sorry and see if he is okay.
LM: I'm sorry. I go home now.
Me: No treats before lunch.
LM: Momma!!! I climbed up and got a treat.
Me: You are not supposed to to do that!
LM: Yeah, you throw them away.
LM: I broke ______.
Me: What happened!?!?
LM: Yeah, I'm in trouble. I sorry.
See a pattern here?
Seriously, what am I supposed to do with this? He clearly knows right from wrong. He has absolutely NO desire to try to hide the fact that he broke one of the house rules, nor is he celebrating the fact that he did so. He is basically just breaking the rule and then self punishing. He looks so damn cute when he is atoning that I have to use all of my willpower not to scoop him up and forgive him on the spot. Most of the time the rule that he has broken is so small that I normally wouldn't give him more than a stern scolding, but he has become one tough jail keeper. I find myself having to hide my laughter when he imposes a much harsher punishment that I would ever give him, and I have to wonder where he comes up with some of these things.
To make matters worse, this brutal honesty has even gone beyond his own acts. If we drive by a broken window, or some graffiti, he will tell me that he did that or broke that and that he is sorry. I sometimes have to wonder if he is serious, but most of the time he is pretty convincing. Today, he saw a building that was being torn down and he told me he "broke it." I assured him that he could not so that much damage (I think) and he seemed to get the idea that he is not responsible for EVERY act of mischief in the entire world.
So if there is any question who stole the cookie from the cookie jar, I can bey you that it was my little man. Even if it wasn't he'll still be ready to take the fall. Hmmmmmm I wonder if he'd take credit for some of those charges on the credit card bill. I may have to work on that one.