Oh, it's going to happen....

Yesterday, I had a follow up with our RE (fertility doc), I went in to the meeting feeling slightly annoyed (okay, very annoyed) that we were having to start from the beginning again, and I left feeling less annoyed and more hopeful. My annoyance stemmed from the fact that  last time I had 17 eggs removed, 11 fertilized, and because our doctor advised us to wait until day 5, I was left with only one shot at implanting the embryo. Our doctor admitted that she gambled a bit (you think????) and did so because she was pretty sure that by having such a strong embryo, factoring in my age and lack of diagnosis, we would have a much greater chance of conceiving. Well, we didn't and she was wrong, and this time around we will be taking a much more conservative approach. That is "if" we get that far.

I had mentioned before that for the next two months we will be giving it the "old college try" and are hoping to conceive this baby without any more medical intervention. I don't know if it's a mind over matter thing or what but for some reason my body seems to be cooperating better than it has in the last two years. Clearly, this is good news and now we are back in the forever long two week wait to see if we were lucky this month. If not we will try one more time and then will be heading back down the IVF road in July. The doctor seemed hopeful and assured me that there is no reason why we can't do this on our own. There are no guarantees, of course, but having that little seed of hope has definitely made the waiting game much more bearable.

If we do end up going the IVF route, things are going to be very different this time. To start with my doctor is going to bump my meds from day one. This will mean that my eggies will grow a lot faster and hopefully there won't be as many, and/or as many little, non-fertilizable, egglets. We will retrieve them all, and rather than waiting until day 5 to transfer or freeze we will be doing so on day 3. Had we done this last time we would have 5 frozen embryos waiting for us to transfer rather than the zero that we are left with now. The doc said that she would be happy if we had 4 or 5 frozen and then each month we could just keeping putting one in and crossing our fingers. This will alleviate a lot of the stress that we went through last time and a lot of pain, physically and mentally, on my end.

When I asked her if she thought this was going to work she looked right at me an said, "oh, it's going to happen. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when." That phrase has been ringing in my head ever since I left the office.

You hear that universe??? It's going to happen! I think it's time that you get with the program.

Coming soon.... baby number 2.