The post baby pictures of Ms. Angelina Jolie have finally surfaced, and it is so not fair! How can the woman look this fabulous? Doesn't she have six kids under the age of six??? Didn't she just birth not one but two babies. Look how together she is.
Here is what I would like to think is really going on in this picture.
- The extra large sunglasses are perfectly placed to cover the deep dark bags that are hiding under her eyes. The kind of bags you only get when you are up half the night with 3 hour feedings and when your oldest had a nightmare and just spent the night sleeping in your bed.
- Her stylish scarf is perfectly placed to hide her newly deflated breasts from the continuous hours of pumping and feeding.
- The picture is only taken from the front to hide her rear which is where all the baby weight is still hiding.
- She is wearing a wig to hide all of the post baby balding. With six kids who could have such a perfect blow out?
- She is a robot. She is not real. Or maybe this is a picture from Madame Toussou's museum where she can be waxed to perfection.
I realize that I am delusional and she really is that perfect. I can live with this. But, the fact that she also gets to have sex with Brad Pitt whenever she wants, well that is where I say SO NOT FAIR. Maybe he is really bad in bed. Somehow I doubt it.
Some girls really do have all the luck.